Casting Call: Liberal radio needs and Ann Coulter

Sheila Lennon sent reader questions, including what I wrote about Outrage Radio last week to the Outrage folks, and has published their response. Regarding my comment, the voice of Outrage, James Linkin continues on a recent theme about language being co-opted by politcs, writing:

In no particular order: We are all prisoners of language. The turmoil of political discourse over the last decade or so has contaminated the traditional labels on the political spectrum, and frankly, I think that’s mostly a good thing. I think we should distinguish between Southern Republicans and South Park Republicans, for example. But in the end, we have to use a word or phrase to contrast us with the right-wing pinheads that have dominated talk radio up to now. Even the word ‘outrage’ doesn’t say enough.

The grim side of the language turmoil is that right-wingers co-opt the language for the purpose of deception: Clear Skies Initiative, No Child Left Behind, partial birth abortion, tax relief, you name it. Our objective is to shed a little light on these subjects, with the appropriate tone.

As for the Ann Coulter of Liberal Radio, perhaps that could be you. Send us a photo.

I could add to this and say that we might also want to distinguish between Southern and Northern Democrats, but after yesterday’s election and the recent Confederate Flagate, I doubt there are any Southern Democrats left.

James Linkin was also kind enough to drop a note in my comments.

I appreciate Sheila forwarding my comment on to Outrage, and am grateful for both Mr. Linkin’s responses. But regarding the possibility of me being the Ann Coulter of Liberal Radio, why, I’ll have to decline, though I am most sincerely grateful for the suggestion.

You see, I can’t be the Ann Coulter of Liberal Radio for any number of excellent reasons. First, I’m not blonde; not even from a bottle, blonde. I’m also not hip or glamorous or fashionable, and nothing I wear is worth more than twenty dollars. New.

(The last time I wore a short, leather skirt, Nixon was still President.)

Career wise, Ann has astutely divined that terrorism sells, and writes best-selling books about traitors and the enemy within (and the enemy without, and the enemy over there, and the enemy over here, and the enemy in our wombs, and the enemy in space, and, well, I digress.) I have never once written about an enemy of the people in any of my books. Well, not unless you want to include my books about Microsoft technology.

Ann has met and had her picture taken with all sorts of famous people. My greatest claim to fame is that I’ve managed to piss off 80 out of the Technorati Top 100 Webloggers, several members of the W3C, and I think a significant portion of people in Boston and San Francisco. Why else do you think I’m in St. Louis?

Most importantly, though, and the real clincher about why I can’t be the Ann Coulter of Liberal Radio: In my last 10,000 words of writing, I only mentioned the word ‘patriotism’ once.

However, I don’t want to let this wonderful opportunity slide by without sharing it with my weblogging sisters. I think what we need here is a “Why I should be the Ann Coulter of Liberal Radio” contest. To enter all you need to do is write a weblog post (or email if you’re not a weblogger), telling the Outrage Radio folks why you think you would be an excellent Ann Coulter of Liberal Radio.

If you have a photo then by all means post it. If it’s of you in a short, leather skirt, extra points. We should also insist on an audio recording of your voice, just to make sure that you don’t sound like a screech owl. However, if you’re blonde enough, and look good in that skirt, I imagine that your voice could be dubbed in.

Since this is a political talk show program, you should demonstrate that you know something about current affairs, and by this I don’t mean what’s happening with J-Lo. Though I hate to discrimate on the basis of war versus non-war bloggers, since this is liberal radio, you ladies with the “I (heart) Bush” on your pages need not apply. Sorry, Glenn, but this means you, too.

Just think: someday when you’re rich and famous, and most likely blonde, you can look back at this moment and this post with fondness, knowing that it was here, in weblogging, that you got your big break.

Go on babies. Show them what you got.