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Hear the crying

First published April 2002 and so apropos today. When two year old pain can sound as fresh and relevant today as then, we as a people are failing our lessons.

“I want silence more than anything. I want everyone to shut the hell up so we can all hear the crying. I want everyone to dip a finger into the deep pool and taste the blood.

LISTEN TO ME. It doesn’t matter who’s right. Let me say that again: Right now, it doesn’t matter who’s right. Stop with the screeds. It doesn’t matter who’s right.”

Jon Carroll San Francisco Chronicle, 4/16/02

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Zero to sixty in ten seconds

Mr. Allan Moult, my friend as well as my boss at Leatherwood Online is celebrating an important birthday tomorrow, tomorrow in this case being May 8th.

Allan is a journalist, photographer, a writer, an editor, and a very interesting person who has traveled more than most people I know. He is also a tireless defender of the natural beauty of Tasmania, and seems most happy when he’s out doors, in the wild he loves so much. As a digital birthday greeting, I thought I would post photos from today’s hike for him, interspersed with some philosophy appropriate to the occasion.

(By the way, today’s hike was several miles over some wicked nasty hills and I hiked it in 90 degree (that’s Blinken’ Hot in Celsius) temperatures. It’s reassuring to people like me and Allan and others of our friends who are no longer young pups, to realize that we’re not getting older, we’re going insane.)

three days climbing
this old heart
goes no further.

Loren Webster

Found on the Net: some ways to know you’re getting older:

1. Everything hurts and what doesn’t hurt doesn’t work.
2. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bi-focals.
3. You feel like the morning after and you haven’t been anywhere.
4. Your little black book contains only names that end in M.D.
5. Your children begin to look middle aged.
6. You finally reach the top of the ladder and find it leaning against the wrong wall.
7. Your mind makes contracts your body can’t meet.
8. You look forward to a dull evening.
9. Your favorite part of the newspaper is “20 Years Ago Today”.
10. You turn out the lights for economic rather than romantic reasons.
11. You sit in a rocking chair and can’t get it going.
12. Your knees buckle, and your belt won’t.
14. You’re 17 around the neck, 42 around the waist, and 95 around the golf course.
15. Your back goes out more than you do.
17. Your Pacemaker makes the garage door go up when you see a pretty girl.
18. The little old gray haired lady you helped across the street is your wife.
19. You sink your teeth into a steak, and they stay there.
20. You have too much room in the house and not enough in the medicine cabinet.
21. You get your exercise acting as a pallbearer for your friends who exercise.
22. You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions.

“You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old. ”

George Burns

“Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.”

Groucho Marx

(Though my particular favorite is, “It isn’t necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.”)

“Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.”

Charles Shultz

Crimson flames tied through my ears
Rollin’ high and mighty traps
Pounced with fire on flaming roads
Using ideas as my maps
“We’ll meet on edges, soon,” said I
Proud ‘neath heated brow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

Half-wracked prejudice leaped forth
“Rip down all hate,” I screamed
Lies that life is black and white
Spoke from my skull. I dreamed
Romantic facts of musketeers
Foundationed deep, somehow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

Girls’ faces formed the forward path
From phony jealousy
To memorizing politics
Of ancient history
Flung down by corpse evangelists
Unthought of, though, somehow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

A self-ordained professor’s tongue
Too serious to fool
Spouted out that liberty
Is just equality in school
“Equality,” I spoke the word
As if a wedding vow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

In a soldier’s stance, I aimed my hand
At the mongrel dogs who teach
Fearing not that I’d become my enemy
In the instant that I preach
My pathway led by confusion boats
Mutiny from stern to bow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

Yes, my guard stood hard when abstract threats
Too noble to neglect
Deceived me into thinking
I had something to protect
Good and bad, I define these terms
Quite clear, no doubt, somehow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

My Back Pages by Bob Dylan

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.”

Albert Einstein

“Everyone here who is damn glad you’re no longer 18–madly wave your hand!”

Shelley Powers

Happy Birthday, my friend.

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Connecting

Drowning in a sea of surety

Recovered from the Wayback Machine.

I think that we should designate one day per week to be Humility Day. Or perhaps Day of Doubt or Insecurity Day.

Each weblog we visit, the owner–myself included–pontificates on all the wrongs and evils of the day. Expressing opinions is a good thing, but lately it seems that even the most thoughtful weblog writers are screaming their words out, pages covered with the spit of their emotional outbursts, saturated with surety.

Not just in politics: I’m finding the same level of surety in technology and tool usage, even which operating system we use. It’s as if none of us can tolerate even the slightest possibility of doubt in our choices. We can’t just talk about how nice our TiBooks are–we have to extol their virtues, defend passionately the interface, angrily denounce the competition.

And don’t even get me started on syndication formats or weblogging tools.

More than the absolutes, I find myself getting burned out by all the good people who are writing for change, as if they’re desperate for change now. Now! Now now now now now! People I admire and agree with, or not, but after a while it’s exhausting reading about one evil after another–bang bang bang–like a machine gun of outrage and despair. And anger.

It sells, too. We once talked about what would it take to get more women in the top of the buzz sheets, and now we know: sex and anger. Technorati 100 is dominated by the Suicide Girls, and many of the top women, such as Michele at A Small Victory, well, they’re angry all the time. Once upon a time Michele didn’t seem so angry but I’ve been reading her these last few weeks and she’s gone after one person or another–and her rank rises with each volley of words.

Anger and sex. Anger, sex, and absolutes. Just listen to the opinions, right and left. If we lined up all the online pundits, end to end, their perceived influence would stand ten times as tall as the actuality. Not only that, but their crap would provide enough ethanol to light the planet.

It’s not that people have opinions about the US President or the election or the war in Iraq–it’s just that they’re so damn sure they’re right. We’ve been talking about how polarized the upcoming election in the States is but on a good day nowadays, I’ll take polarized over what we’ve got. Everyone is so damn angry.

Look. It made me angry.

If we could have just one day per week when we all talked softly and quietly; when we listened to others views, and actually listened, not filtered; where we didn’t shoot from the hip, bringing out the verbal axes at first word; maybe where we even acknowledge that we don’t have all the answers–I can’t help thinking that we’d all be richer for the experience.

I’m not talking about expressions of brotherly love and joy-joy talk from feel good brothers and sisters; I’m also not saying we need to agree– that’s not the point. Trying to pretend we’re all one big loving family would be just as hollow, and fake, as implying that those who disagree with us are evil.

What I’m saying is: no bad guys; no heros; no absolutes. Can’t we set aside one day per week when we’re not a hundred percent right?

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Lord, grant me tolerance

My belief in the existence of God or not is simple. And personal.

My country does not have to believe as I do.

If a child is hungry they don’t have to believe as I do for me to give them food.

If a man is sick and can’t rise from his bed, he doesn’t have to believe as I do for me to give him comfort.

If a woman is pregnant and unsure whether to have the baby or not, she doesn’t have to believe as I do for me to respect her choice.

If a family is out of work and out of money and worried about clothing for the children or losing their home or getting sick, they don’t have to believe as I do for me to want to help them.

If people are different, in how they love or who they want to marry, they don’t have to believe, or act, as I do for me to wish them luck–love has a hard enough time surviving these days without being bombarded with stones by the fearful.

I don’t have to believe in the souls of animals, or the uniqueness of a single rock; to see an inherent holiness in a tree or flower or drops of water–nor be reminded of the responsibilities as caretaker I am given at birth– in order to cherish the beauty of this world, and to try to preserve it.

If a people live in fear, in the midst of daily war and strife, they don’t have to believe as I do for me to want to remove that which frightens them.

Before this upcoming election, before any election in any country, tell those who represent you in government that no matter what party you belong to, or what issues you feel most deeply about, one thing you won’t do is use your vote to force your neighbors into believing as you do. Those who do so are saying, “My God is the one true God, and therefore you must follow my beliefs.”

Say back to them, ‘A God that is the one true God and therefore omnipotent can’t be harmed by anything I do, or believe.”

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Connecting Technology

Googled to death

For someone interested in this sort of thing–I am interested in this sort of thing, aren’t I?–I never did make a statement about Google’s Gmail.

Gmail is a centralized email system with virtually unlimited space to hold your messages, and with the ability to use Google’s search algorithms to research your email. Bells and whistles aside, that’s all it is. I have a Yahoo email account I maintain for emergencies–where’s the beef?

There was some discussion about privacy concerns because after all, Google does hold your messages, your data, and does search your email to post targeted ads. I agree with Tim O’Reilly on this issue in his writing The Fuss about Gmail and Privacy: Nine Reasons Why It’s Bogus. Some folks think that Big Brother will force Google to allow him to peek into our private emails. However, for the terrorists among you, I would suggest that you consider not using a centralized email system to exchange words about your plans to take over the world.

What Tim says about privacy and email is spot on: we’ve had centralized email systems like Gmail before, and email itself is notoriously easily compromised. Never assume privacy with email and if you want to say something in private, I suggest lunch in a quiet bistro somewhere.

However, I do disagree with O’Reilly’s overjoy about the benefits of Gmail. He envisions this great global social software network that would allow our email systems to link us to appropriate people based on need and someday we’ll move all our data to the Core and access it with our data ports that also double as tie clips, cellphones, and nose rings.

Yeah, and when that happens to the general populace and not just the Network junkies, pigs will fly on pretty, pretty dragonfly wings.

Do you really want who you know and who you like and who you trust mapped into some universal algorithm so that your system can tell Person B who knows you who knows Person A and then Person B pushes you to connect them up with Person A, when maybe you don’t necessarily agree with Person B about what all this knowing really means.

Do you really want to be that wired?

Even if I and most people could get over our repugnance with this type of overall encompassing and non-directed and pervasive/invasive social software network, this type of overall, all inclusive centralized core of data is anathema to those of us who believe in decentralized systems.

O’Reilly writes:

Storage of my critical data on one of the largest, most reliable data storage banks in the world. As Rich Skrenta made so clear in his recent weblog posting, Google is the shape of the future. Forget Moore’s Law and Metcalfe’s Law. Storage is getting cheaper faster than any other part of the technology infrastructure. I remember Bob Morris, head of IBM’s Storage Division and the Almaden Research Labs, telling me a couple of years ago, that before too long, storage would be cheap enough and small enough that someone who wanted to do so could film every moment of his life, and carry the record around in a pocket. Scary? Maybe. But the future is always scary to those who cling to the past. It is enormously exciting if you focus on the possibilities. Just think how much value Google and other online information providers have already brought to all of our lives – the ability to find facts, in moments, from a library larger than any of us could have imagined a decade ago.

Anybody who would store their critical data on a system in which they have no control, and one which is used by millions of people is, well, to put it kindly, caught up in the enthusiasm of the moment.

I guess I am old, and too set in my ways. Too many ghosts in the machine for my liking now, without opening the door to hordes more of them, just because somebody dangles a new pretty in front of my face, and I like the sparkle.

Besides, I am getting weary to death of Google. First it was Google buying Blogger, then Orkut, and then Gmail, and now its the IPO where we get to hear about how some very rich people are going to get even richer. It’s just a software company. It’s big machines with lots of data and some good developers and some interesting algorithms, some of which don’t always work as well as we would like. I agree with William Grosso: Anyone Else Bored by the 24 x 7 Google Watch?

(Well, that was good–I managed to fulfill my Google quota for an entire year with one posting. Good, economic writing, that.)