How to rollout a Web 2.0 product

Recovered from the Wayback Machine.

Here are the steps to take when rolling out a new Web 2.0 product.

First, drop the last ‘e’ in your name.

Second, insinuate either directly or indirectly that your competitors are afraid of you because they don’t provide a direct pipeline into their customer data for your use.

Also mention how un-Web 2.0 like it is that your competitors are violating the spirit of the open web. Get your buddies to make a cryptic side reference to this at a talk on core values on the web.

When you have infrastructure problems, no need to hire an experienced tech when you can hire an evangelist instead.

Make a lot out of the application’s cool features. Much coolr than a certain othr company. Even more of how young the lead developer is. Make a _really_ big deal at how young the developr is. This is important–make sure that everyone knows that how this product will kick butt because of the youth of the developer (as compared to the old farts over at …. well, you know).

(Also make sure to mention how the application was coded in only three months. That makes it even cooler.)

Spend a lot of time with Om Malik because, well, um, because he’s Om?

Plan a big rollout party at the exact same time you plan on turning on the all new technology. At the exact same time as you’re rolling out the major application change. Free beer!

Leak rumors that your company might be aquired for millions just before the launch.

Give exactly 24 hours notice to your clients that you’re closing down the site for over a day to roll out the new features.

Come back later and say the rollout is ’slightly’ delayed because of a DOS attack.

Site will be down a little longer. Nasty bullies. But gamely appear at party anyway.

(Show photo of buzz producing human holding Stormhoek wine poster. Damn, my heart stopped a moment from that blast.)

Day 2: *silence* (Must be one hell of a DOS attack.)

Day 3: *silence* (But that’s OK, because the site has ‘beta’ on it. Everyone knows that ‘beta’ means, well, broken. But still cool.)

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