Weblog as Foreplay

Recovered from the Wayback Machine.

I discovered the weblog wKenShow when he blogged about one of my posts, and I’ve since run into him at other weblogs. I read his weblog off and on, usually when I see it updated in

I may joke about more sex in weblogging, but I’m a bit of a prude, really. I focus more on sensuality rather than explicit sexuality, though the two are closely connected for me. wken, however, discusses sexuality quite frequently, usually explicitly.

Dammit! Don’t go there yet! Read the rest of my post first.

Today wken asked a question of the women in his audience:

I do have a question for the women out there, though. If you started dating someone and were attracted to them, then found that they had a blog like mine, would you be bothered by it? I’m not talking about any posts that might detail your dates or talk about you. I just mean, if he had a blog with the types of sexually explicit entries and the OrgasmaChron and such things as I have here, would it scare you off?

An honest question, and from the comments, some good answers. And in a later post, he writes:

What I’m concerned about is what type of impression I give through this site to a woman that might be romantically interested in me. Do I come across as “only interested in one thing” or “weirdly promiscuous”? Does my online flirting make me look like someone constantly “on the make”?

Again, good question. wken is opening a dialog with his readers about discussing sex in a weblog, and the possible impacts this could have on his real-life relationships.

Issues about the sexuality in wken’s posts aside, I find that for myself, personally, I would rather go out with a weblogger than not. With a weblog, I’ve been allowed to peek into the person’s thoughts and feelings and views; I’ve looked into their naked soul, well at least as much of their soul as they’ve exposed. I think I would feel ‘blind’, in the metaphorical sense, dating somebody without a weblog.

This adds a whole new dimension to the term ‘blind’ date, doesn’t it?

You can take a year and not find out as much about a person as you can with three months of weblog postings. (Of course, this all presupposes that the weblogger isn’t writing pure bullshit.)

Back to the questions that wken is posing though: what would a woman think about dating wken after reading his weblog. For myself, other than the fact that wken is too young, I wouldn’t necessarily be uncomfortable dating him because he’s open about sexuality, as long as I felt secure that he wouldn’t post about our relationship. And as for his weblog, I would more likely focus on the non-sex related postings to get a better feel for wken (pun not intended) as a person. From these I can see that wken is a intelligent, with a decent grasp of politics and a strong sense of perspective. All good traits. And yeah, he likes sex a lot, but that’s not a bad thing.

That’s a lot about wken there for a perspective date to read–what will they talk about in the first hour? The posting of July 22nd?

All of you that weblog and are already in a relationship have had to wrestle with the dilemma of how much about your relationship and your lover you should put online. For those of us who are single, though, we’re now faced with the fact that our weblogs have become a curricula vitae for prospective dating partners.

Oh. No.

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